


One Night

by KiraMae



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Christmas, Gen, Holidays
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-24
Updated: 2013-12-24
Packaged: 2018-01-05 23:53:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1100027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KiraMae/pseuds/KiraMae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Reaper War makes it easy to forget it's Christmas.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One Night

**Author's Note:**

> I love fluff. FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF. But there has been so much Christmas fluff lately, that I just had to... salt it a little. I have no other explanation. I'm sorry.

When Shepard returned to her cabin, it was very late; time didn’t matter much, in space, but the Normandy and her predominantly human crew were on a 24 hour cycle, and it was well past 0230 when she came striding through the doors from the lift.  She’d been awake for going on 36 hours, though one wouldn’t know it to look at her; running on adrenaline, there was no falter in her step, nor haze on her vision. Sure she was tired, but wasn’t she always? She refused to let it slow her in the slightest.

“-put through a rush request to the Turians for additional support in the Aethon Cluster. I’m not asking them to take it back from the Reapers, but we need more cover for the evacuation effort, there are still stranded civilians there,” she was saying authoritatively to the ceiling, though her eyes were glued to the datapad in her hand and the columns of numbers rolling across its display.

“Acknowledged, Commander. Anything else?” The ceiling answered.

“Not at the moment, EDI, but keep your ears open in case I come up with something.” She tossed the datapad on her desk, finally looking up. That was when she saw Kaidan, sitting heavily on the edge of the bed. He gestured at her with an empty glass.

“Merry Christmas, sweetheart.”

A small, plastic tree spread it’s thin branches beside the fish tank, colored lights blinking from amidst the false greenery. From somewhere, “Jingle Bells” was playing in tinny chords, almost too quiet to hear. The small table in front of the sofa was spread with a silver-edged table cloth, snowy white and slightly shimmery. Two tapered candles had burned down to tiny nubs in silver holders; two steaks, seasoned to perfection, sat hard and cold on their plates, beside mounds of untouched potatoes and vegetables gone mushy. How long had he been waiting for her? He hadn’t eaten a bite. The only thing he’d obviously gotten into was the champagne; an empty bottle lay on it’s side beside an ice bucket that currently held only warm water.

“Kaidan, what are you doing?”

“Surprising you. Didn’t realize that conference call was going to run so late,” he said, the slightly slurred words not blunting the acid in his voice.

“I told you not to do this. I told you not to plan anything, and I told you not to wait up for me,” Shepard said defensively. It wasn’t like Kaidan to drink. He was clearly very upset, but…  _I don’t have time for this_ , she thought.

“I wanted to surprise you,” he repeated. “It’s Christmas. So here I am. Surpriiiiiiiiise.” He shook his hands like a jazz minstrel, the one holding the empty glass flinging sticky droplets of alcohol everywhere.

“Kaidan, you’re drunk,” she said, turning away, refusing to feel guilty for forgetting. “Clean this up, and then get some sleep. I’ve got work to do.” She started to pull the chair out from her desk, fingers already activating the terminal, the screen lighting up to display files she’d left open. She stopped when he lurched to a standing position and threw his cup at the window separating her desk from the bedroom. It bounced off with a hollow clack, plastic against plastic, and fell onto the sofa beneath. He glared angrily through the barrier between them.

“Work! Of course. Work, work, work. The great Commander Shepard, how would the galaxy survive without her.” The words hit her like a slap in the face, the bitterness leaving her smarting. “Would it kill you to take one night? It’s fucking Christmas, Shepard. And all I want-” he caught his breath, voice breaking. “All I want, is for one night, to come first. Trillions of people in this galaxy, and every last one of them is more important to you than me.”

“That’s not true-”

“Isn’t it?” He refused to drop his gaze, and she could see the pain in him. Pain she’d caused.

“You wouldn’t say things like this if you were sober.” She broke eye contact first, unable to handle the accusations in his eyes.

“No. But I’d think it.” He wasn’t going to let it go. “I’m not asking for much here. Just- just come here. Give me one night. Give me Christmas.”

Suddenly, she was angry. How could he  _be_  so selfish? “Christmas? You think the Reapers are going to stop for Christmas? News flash, Alenko: they’re not! So why should I?”

“ _You’re_  not a Reaper!”

His words pierced her defensive shell, and just as quickly as it had flared up, her anger was gone. She gripped the edge of the desk, staring down at the surface, but not really seeing it. She sensed him moving up the low steps and coming around behind her, putting his arms around her.

“It’s OK, Shepard. It’s OK,” he murmured, voice soothing. Something wet splashed on the desk in front of her, and she realized she was crying, hot, salty tears chasing eachother down her face. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to throw things and yell at you, that was childish. Please don’t cry, I didn’t mean to-”

“-remind me that I’m human?” she asked, letting out a harsh laugh. But she let him turn her around, and gather her into his arms, and damn if it didn’t feel good to release the iron grip she had on herself, if only for a moment. She let out a shaky breath, and looked up at him. His hair was mussed, his face unshaven, eyes red-rimmed. Was it the war taking it’s toll on him, or just her?

In a moment of clarity, she knew. She knew that while she’d see this war through to it’s bitter end, that her fate was tied up with the Reapers. She was ready to sacrifice everything to stop them, without a second of hesitation. Not even her love for the man who held her in his arms could change that.  Kaidan knew that, too, and he was fighting it, but he was right. The rest of the galaxy came first.

He’d nearly broken the first time she’d died. She couldn’t do that to him again.

She smiled up at him to hide the flicker of doubt. “Alright Kaidan,” she said. “One night.”

One  _last_  night.


End file.
